I am always slightly uncomfortable when I watch great Brit Gordon Ramsay eviscerate his newbies in the early weeks of Hell’s Kitchen, but even though this ginger fascist makes me gulp I still love HK and he is the star that keeps me tuning in. What I love about Kitchen Nightmares is the positivity Gordon exudes when he tells someone to f*@k off. It is far more loving.
The latest set of tards to get the Ramsay redux was a Belmore, NY family owned restaurant called the Mixing Bowl. Like the other two restaurants of this season the eatery is set a stones throw from Manhattan and is helmed by a lumbering Frankenstein of a manger who has let the place slide down the slope of incompetence. Owners Billy and Lisa have let their marriage mirror the path of their place and from the looks of their sad faces they’ve given up.
Gordo’s meal of crabcakes and zucchini is interrupted by the resident zombie manager who can’t stop staring at him and asks, “May I ask how you’re enjoying your food?” to which Gordon responds, “May I ask you to stop staring at me?” Come on now, that’s quick and pleasing with a bold finish. Eventually Gordon puts manager Mike’s cheesy signs in the wood chipper, inspires owner chef Billy to come out of the kitchen and rehabs the menu to include more healthy, spa-friendly cuisine. It works, the restaurant is saved and Lisa and Billy have not stopped copulating since.
I used to find Chef Ramsay a little repulsive. He has the forehead wrinkles of a geriatric pug, the accent of a Dickens orphan and the disposition of an arthritic old lady. I was baffled in the first couple of seasons how anyone could find this slice of carrot cake sexually appealing, but seeing Gordon in his element helping bring a family together and bringing out the best elements is a restaurant makes his expertise endearing. However it’s his alpha male strut and spiky hair that make him downright sexy. I was aroused. And hungry.
